A Midrash of Mine

LORD of the Sabbath, King of Kings, I, yes I, I speak to Thee in the valley of suffering and doubt. It is not You, Oh LORD, Who I doubt, but myself; yet Thy manifold blessings toward me are endless, yet my heart does not perceive them. Why, LORD, doth the sinner prosper? Why does the unrighteous man bear many children? Why do the wicked go in companies, and destroy the fruits of the righteous, and say, “God does not see!” They force Your people to curse with their cruel sciences, and they teach wicked laws, and repentance is far from them. Their lips are nowhere near You, and their hearts are hidden in deep and wicked counsels against the LORD.

Who, LORD, shall hold them accountable? Is Your Law of no effect? Does the righteous man go to hell, and the sinner get saved? Does he who gives his substance to the poor, is he now cursed, and the stingy man blessed? Is the witch and warlock who curses and makes enchantments over Your elect, and Your divine inheritance, are they now right before Your eyes, and Your people cast off like a dead branch, for wanting to serve You, and honor Your Law? Is the righteous in perpetual doubt, because of You, that You bless the wicked, and give the saints ashes and humble them, and turn all their wisdom to ashes, and Adam himself says, “My wife is no longer worthy” for as Clement says, “Envy, all are envious of the positions of divine authority.” So he says to me, “Be small, and little among the church.” LORD, I am small, and I am stricken and seen as lame by all around me, and a man not to be trusted. Yet, what I speak is for You, and You have given me into the hands of mine enemies, and have given them freedom to destroy me to the very core of my being. For what cause? Because I tried to honor You with every substance I had, and my full time, and the witch had enchanted me in the diner saying, “Do not accomplish thy work, do not seek God, but lay your burden to the plough, and maim yourself, so you can become Antichrist like us.” LORD, they sought my life, and sought to lay the burden to my soul, but I was steadfast, and am patiently awaiting my answer. Hephzibah shall be given to Your servants, and Beulah to Your chosen, and one requisite there is for salvation, and only one, and that is to call upon the name of Jesus, whom Barnabas confirms. Ignatius says, “Yes, where is it written?” For the volume of the Book is a witness of You, and I shall honor You with my whole heart, and my whole soul, and my whole strength, and do the things which are pleasing in Your sight, by seeking You day and night, and saying to the world, “Thou art a fecal draped garment in woman’s blood, and the seed of an ass.” Therefore, I shall not seek it at all, but shall live at peace in my heart with all men. Mine enemy and my friend, and speak blessing over the congregation forever, for I shall say to the witch, “You cursed me, but I do not curse you.” I shall say to the sick, “Thou art sick, but I fear not thine disease, for the LORD is with me.” I shall say to the poor, “Heap up warmth, and I will give you what little substance I have.” I shall say to the false seer who warned me of naught but her own foolish burden, “Why do you curse me and my work, and make me an offender? When I seek God plainly? Need not an ox eat while it is threshing the field? Should I ask you to confirm the message twice, which you would not do? And therefore, have lost much time and energy not knowing what way to prosper? Even you, I do not hold you accountable, for we are all taught to lie, and all men are liars. Even I, even I. I am not burdened.” I shall say to the King, “Stand your arms down, stand your arms down, but fight the good fight, fight the good fight… we need not to enflame kings any longer, but rather need mercy on the battlefront, and to yield fruit for our allies.”