Fairyland is stale.
But I need a story.
Got one the other day.
Got two chapters into it,
Will probably finish it.
Did a terribly frightening story last night.
Will not publish that one.
It scares me. A Dystopian poem
That is more like a horror movie.
When I go dark, like I did with Utopia
I normally will spend a lot of time making it lighter.
I don’t think I have that urge to write,
Though. It’s like I’ve already climbed Everest.
What’s there next?
It’s going to be hard to generate ideas.
I do have one good one at the moment.
One good one
Another I intend to do about David and Absalom.
So, Subang, this poem I’m writing, David and Absalom
And of course this ugly thing I have to fix…
Those will probably be my next published book.
I have another work I’m working on.
Of course. That one is nature poetry.
That will take some time to get done.
I have all summer, and a long time after
To go. That one is more a simple style
Simplistic metaphors
Just nothing so crazy.
Some untapped styles are of course Metaphor driven nature poems.
But I don’t have the mind to really do it.
I normally express myself better through narrative
Because it has existential structure.
That, in laymen’s terms
Is plot. But, more specifically
Time and action in narrative.
It’s a really technical term
That normally gets applied to one’s ability
To navigate time in their works.
Linking together events
Things like that.
I’m really good at that.
I’m good at finding meaning within
Action… Parables are interesting for that reason.
However, driving at metaphors
Without stories is kind of difficult for me.
And, the stories are starting to run out…
So to speak. I don’t really have any interest
In going further into Fairyland
As it’s kind of obnoxious at the moment.
It’s like… Racket.
And Bitter Medicine was written expressly to kind of go there
And I don’t want to make another work of poetry
Just criticizing my work.
Which, Fairyland is very obnoxious at the moment.
It really, really is.
Because I have to tap into unconscious material
And make it conscious, which gets latent up there
And kind of bounces around in weird ways.
And it reverberates into my day to day life.
Which is annoying.
Because, the metaphors in Fairyland are actually true…
Which is important that we understand fiction like that.
But, the actual events of unicorns and dragons
And fairy stones and fairy lords, and imps and cockatrices
And whatever else is up there… it is running dry.
The archetypal world of fantasy is of course
A thing that can be done for an entire lifetime.
Just, I’m bored with it.
I like my simple driven nature poems.
I don’t like really being complex right now.
It’s kind of an unwinding time for me.
Less about complex stuff.
It’s not that I can’t do it
But that it’s boring, and it’s starting to get derivative
Which, I’m looking into Wordsworth’s style
But don’t want to go there because
It’s too complex. It’s still hard to understand
And I want more simple poetry in my repertoire
Which is kind of in demand from family members.
They don’t like Fairyland, though it’s my most popular
Here on the website.
Psalms and things don’t get stale.
They just don’t really come up organically
Unless there is something to organically write.
It’s not prophecy. For sure…
It’s just some kind of thing is there in the writing of my Psalm like poems
Which glorifies Jesus,
And I don’t believe that they need to be written
Unless I need to write it.
I’m not writing the Bible…
So, I keep reminding myself of this
To kind of ward off stupid things that people might say about my writing.
It kind of has religious undertones
But I avoid making cult writings because I know they can only end up in disaster.
So, explicitly, Fairyland is about done. It’s getting there, and it’s really annoying me
To have to write more.
Simple metaphors, though, are pleasing me.
I just don’t want to drive into Bathos.
Which, Bathos is a word meaning
Essentially, “Gaudy.”
Or, “In Bad Taste.”
Like, for instance, it would be applied to
Gratuitous sex scenes
Serial killings are normally bathos—
It’s like entering into that realm
That art ought not enter into
Because it’s no longer beautiful
Nor edifying, but rather is disturbing.
That’s a element you need to avoid
In writing because it’s not helping the audience.
Though a lot of people explore it
I try to avoid it.
A good example is a Poet I saw on the internet
Who just kind of recited in pomp
A word I will not say
Because then everyone would know who it is…
But this person has a long credential list of writings
Apparently, I don’t really have any association with his work
Or know any of it, just this one thing he recited.
And, when you’re reciting something pornographic
Like you’re reciting Southey,
It’s a good chance you are entering into Bathos again.
So… here’s two terms I’ve just taught you.
Some other things I want to do
Is avoid the Quest Romance.
Enough has been done on it.
That is a term
Which means… essentially
The hero obtaining their goal.
Which, is everything these days
And it’s a stale trope
Which needs to kind of be set in the back burner
For me… because I’m tired of always having heroes slaughter demons
And it’s getting to a point where it’s no longer edifying me to write it.
It’s really a strain,
And I’m favoring more simple things at the moment.
Which, quest romances are about as simple a plot device
There is. I just don’t want to go there… at the moment…
Because it’s too derivative a plot device.
My roots are strong in more existentialist literature
Rather than simple quest romances.
Which, existentialist literature—
Again… so you understand—
Is kind of questioning whether there is a meaning to life.
It’s a more open ended, philosophical question.
It’s no longer about plot, but more ruminating on
Existence, and whether there is meaning.
And of course there is…
That’s always my go to. Is showing the meaning
And kind of mooting existentialism.
But, it’s still a force to be reckoned with.
There really are only two metaphysical philosophies.
Those who claim there is.
And those who claim there isn’t.
I am the former,
As most rational people are.
The latter is typically a negative construct.
So, most of philosophy is dealing with trying to prove the former.
Which, I’m not a philosopher. I’m a writer.
The writer is more in line like an Eastern Philosopher.
They are concerned with what is.
Because it is.
Because you see it.
And you see it works.
That’s how Confucianism and Taoism kind of work
In tandem, both are making positive claims to knowledge.
The one is about “Emptiness.” The other is about “Fullness.”
And, these don’t really interest me as philosophies.
I look at Taoism and Confucianism as less than religions
And more like governing practices.
Buddhism I don’t really care for as a philosophy
Or religion… I tend to just set it aside
As it tends to leech off of other belief structures
And find identity in those.
It’s really less of a means or ends.
It’s more a distraction
And making arguments for moot
Things. Which interests me in another way
Because it’s not really an eastern philosophy.
It’s more western in nature.
Because it’s rooted in skepticism.
Not rooted in empiricism or
Even knowledge.
Eastern and Middle Eastern
Philosophies are more rooted in taking for granted the tangible.
And, they do this for good reason.
It produces moral absolutes
Which help structure societies
And keep them from deteriorating.
Buddhism is really along the lines of
Socratic Skepticism.
There’s differences.
Socrates had a more atheistic philosophy
Not that he was an Atheist.
It just wasn’t concerned with matters beyond the scope of philosophy.
Buddhism, on the other hand, is an enigma to me
And it’s an enigma to most people who practice it.
Because it really gets conflated with Taoism
And it’s really, like I said, a leech philosophy.
It really frustrates me, too
Because it kind of makes assumptions
And then claims it makes no assumptions.
And what assumptions it makes
Are nihilistic in nature
And really… I can find no religion I despise more than it.
Because it really has no answer.
And I find Christianity
Answers all of it.
I like to have answers.
And Christianity gives me answers.
The only thing I don’t know
Is why it’s the only religion that saves.
But, given it’s the only one that proves itself
Over and over and over again
In its moral assumptions
I find it to be the religion most rooted in truth.
Buddhism does not ever claim truth.
Taoism does. Let’s be clear here…
Lao Tsu is always affirming a way.
It may be empty, it may be all sorts of nonsense
It also might be backwards in every sense of the word
But, it arrives at a place more concrete than Buddhism ever has.
And this comes up because I’m tired of having this discussion
In my writing.
I really am tired of Buddhism and Existentialism
Being criticized because it’s really
At this point, thoroughly defeated.
If anyone were to read what I’ve written
And the copious amounts of literature I’ve read…
It’s clear to me that people don’t make their own meaning.
It’s doubly clear to me that absolutes exist
And really, we can ponder all day about an impossibility
But, it’s an infinite regress of just shaving away things
That ought to be taken for granted.
For one thing, Buddhism has its wisdom.
To critically think.
But, they defeat themselves by never reaching a conclusion.
Western Philosophy does the same thing
Almost regrettably…
And, I’m tired of hashing that whole thing over and over
And over and over and over again in my writing.
It’s a great conflict.
But, again, I’m tired of Quest Romances,
I’m tired of always hashing out the same philosophical problems.
I’m really, to be honest…
Not interested in writing about philosophy in general.
Because it is a subject that is steeped in ridiculous traditions
And problems I’ve had answered since I was eight.
I never questioned the reality I was presented with.
I don’t think I ought to be questioning it, either.
I think, for moral purposes,
Reality ought to be a given
And no further examination ought to be done.
Because there are questions beyond that scope
That need answered more imperatively
Like for instance, “Ought I give to charity
“Or ought I not because it makes people dependent?”
And this is more practical, which is why my mind
Always divests into political theory
Instead of lofty notions of whether a circle exists
Or a square is a square.
I would rather look at Euclid and see
It is certain, and not get caught up in the abstract.
Nor, get caught up in the certainty
That seems to be a problem with scientists.
Because there are questions we can’t answer
With science. That’s also a given.
But, I’m tired of writing about it.
It’s annoying.
What I rather would write about
At the moment, is essays on other people’s writings.
It’s a passion of mine.
I like to see other people’s ideas
Because mine are mine.
They don’t get any more interesting
When they just kind of sit in a reverberating echo chamber
Of internal thoughts and soliloquies.
So… yeah. Obviously I’m concerned with what is.
Not what I believe. Not what I think.
I’m more traditional that way.
And I want my writing to reflect that instead.
More concrete things…
But, again, avoiding bathos at all costs.
I don’t want to be the Poet Laureate
Who all of a sudden starts confusing kitsch
With real ideas.
And kitsch is a really badly defined word:
But it’s basically just a form of sentimentality.
Like, feeling in love is not kitsch. When a work does that
It’s highly important because it’s a sign of empathy
And unfortunately sentimentalism has been coined as a word
Which applies to any emotion in writing
Being used to morally understand.
Reason cannot come to a moral conclusion.
We’ve seen it time and time again.
Emotions can’t, either.
But, reason and emotions, and of course God
Can come to moral conclusions. Which is why all three
Need to be used in reaching moral conclusions.
And, that’s why I like the Hortus Conclusus.
I like it because it’s a device that helps you
See the life, or the good life, and the character is trying to obtain it.
It’s not quest romance. That’s more simple.
Hortus Conclusus is an object.
It’s translated as “Sealed Garden”
Or often related to the Song of Solomon.
Which, in a broader context, it just means
The desired outcome of life
And exploring how to reach it.
Which is what I would rather be spending my time with…
And part of that is sentimental.
People don’t want to live without emotions.
So… people don’t want to read without emotions.
And I’d really rather be exploring the means to
Bettering one’s life
Rather than the means of justifying
There is a meaning to life.
Which, the meaning is the Sealed Garden.
I do believe that
But unfortunately
Our existence is tainted with evil.
Both personal decisions and external factors.
I believe these are just a part of free will.
And disasters strike.
The Lisbon Earthquake was
Kind of a wake up call to Europe…
But… it’s something that doesn’t need sliced with a razor.
It needs to rather be put in its proper perspective.
Bad things happen
Because there are forces out of our control.
Are they in God’s control?
Yes… but they still happen
And the reason is always to find moral growth.
B. K. Neifert 