Write a Brainstorm

Write a brainstorm

Let the novel sit for two years…

It sits, hidden in the book collection

Of hand written journals.

A pet project here,

A pet project there,

Maybe a modern novel will be written by my fingers.

Idolatry… I hope this art isn’t idolatry.

I love writing…

I love it.

The pride of authorship

The joy of seeing myself grow.

Seeing the pangs of youth

Burgeon to the strength of mind in adulthood.

The communist rants

Turn into Burkean homilies.

For my less informed reader…

The one who doesn’t know what Burkean means…

There’s an old saying.

If you are not a liberal in youth,

You have no heart.

If you’re not a conservative in adulthood,

You have not yet grown up.

How the tea kettles I’ve talked about

Those torpid tea kettles

In the meaningful nonsense poems

Burgeon to strange worlds

And fantasies.

Yet, there sits my novel in a dozen pages…

The professional writer

Their obvious fault is that they prescribe too many rules.

The amateur writer,

Their obvious fault is that they follow too many rules.

How many spelling errors are there in my writing?

I don’t know…

How many comas misplaced?

I don’t know.

How many “Their”s mistaken for “They’re.”

I don’t know.

How many “Then”s

For “Than”.

I don’t know.

Sadness creeps into my bones

Because I don’t know how or what to write.

My self editing is sallow.

My work ethic failing.

Because I see either success or failure

Do not produce the results I want.

I don’t know what would satisfy me…

I eat, but am unsatisfied.

Just like Micah’s curse.

I wonder what reason I am cursed…

I look at my entire life and I find there

The fact that I have committed much wrongdoing.

The same amount as most radical feminists.

My sin is theirs,

But their sin everyone covers up.

Mine… it keeps me poor

Hated, unprotected,

Reliant on everyone else around me.

If I had the answer

I would find it.

It’s amazing to me how everyone just revels in sin

And seems happy and blessed.

I wait on God to judge them…

But He doesn’t.

The happiest on earth

I’ve found,

Are usually the most vile.

It’s why I’m a Christian.

They make a diligent search for sin

And it’s always found in me…

How that stings my breast to say it.

I cannot escape it.

What I would like…

Truthfully,

Is one woman to make love to my whole life

That I can trust with my very life.

This hobby, I would hope to eat from.

But I don’t want fame or fortune.

I can’t work,

Because Fairyland is real to me…

It’s always there in my mind as I sweep

Or mop, or stack crates.

This talent, I need to eat from it.

But I cannot. Some arcane force

Will not let me.

Call it a king, call it a queen

Call it FBI

Call it Satan…

I will call it what it is.

I don’t want to be famous.

What a stupid profession to get entangled in

If I didn’t want money or fame…

Self defeated, I will always self defeat.

Because I don’t want everyone talking about me.

I don’t want my laundry aired to the whole world

And made public, what I know is public

But at least now I don’t have to hear about it.

So… Athena, as it is,

Thinks he’s harming me by keeping me poor.

Really, he is just gobbling up the portion

That I know, in this day and age,

Would eat me up.

Satan… my bloggers,

Can be a kindness on a Christian.

He can take the world,

When you don’t want it.

He can gobble up fortunes,

When those fortunes would incur great wrath.

He can keep you poor,

When riches would steal your soul.

Jude’s greatest wisdom was this,

To not revile angelic majesties.

The reason why, is that Satan

Is there for our benefit, Christians.

How we don’t want to admit it,

But the rod is there for our bruises,

And the bruises are there for our growth.

We grow, and become great through our stripes.

Satan is not there to hurt you, Christians.

He is a roaring lion in the street…

He does wish to devour every one of us.

But Satan is called upon whom he is called.

It is God who unleashes the lion on your life.

And for that, he might gobble up your fortunes,

He might frustrate you with banal dreams…

He might even hold the very thing you want…

But know, a man who gets everything he wants

Is usually the same man who destroys himself.

Yes… someone prevents me from getting published.

Yes, it frustrates me.

Yes, a part of it is myself.

But yes, a part of it is a deal with the devil…

Not mine, but the LORD’s

Who made a bargain with Satan

In Job. Not so Satan could destroy Job.

No. Simply because Job needed to be abased

For self righteousness.

Did Job sin?

Righteousness is not a sin.

But if Job’s own right arm would bear him,

Let Job smite God’s enemies.

But he couldn’t.

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Brother

Spider-man…

I’m Sony’s.

He’s Columbia’s.

I was Twenty-one

He was Thirty.

It all became crap

In 2008.

He sewed his suit.

I sewed mine, too.

He’s Albert Einstein.

I’m Dietrich Bonhoeffer.

You all know him.

None of you know me.

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The Ten Commandments, Written For Butch Too Understand

Tablet I

I. Thou shalt love Jesus with everything you have and own, and have no other God.

II. Thou shalt not put any thing before your service to Jesus.

III. Thou shalt not use God’s name falsely, in order to deceive, nor use it in anger.

IV. Thou shalt rest in Jesus alone to save you, and shall not oppress your hireling by making them work on the Sabbaths, nor defraud them of any of their rights.

V. Thou shalt obey your father and your mother, so it will be well with your soul, and you will prosper.

Tablet II

VI. Thou shalt not kill,— or even be angry with your brother to slander him nor defraud him in any way.

VII. Thou shalt not commit adultery, or even look at any woman with lust, for your intent is to shame her, and therefore commit a filthy act.

VIII. Thou shalt not desire what is clearly not yours.

IX. Thou shalt not even steal a worthless thing from your neighbor or friend, yes, even your brother and especially not your father or mother.

X. Thou shalt not lie in order to put yourself at an advantage or your enemy at a disadvantage. You must surely tell the truth.

*. Love your fellow neighbor the same way as you surely love yourself in all things.

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Doppelganger

Spider-man…

I’m Sony’s.

He’s Disney’s.

I was Twenty-one

He was sixteen.

It all became crap

In 2008.

He has an advanced suit

Built by Tony Stark.

I have one I sewed.

He’s Johnny English.

I’m Dietrich Bonhoeffer.

You all know him.

None of you know me.

God Gave Me the Lyrics to this Song, I Dictated it While Listening

Yea, we in Christ we live for, poor:—

The silver thread on Darkened doom—

With closing eyes and resting head

I hold and see His coming soon.

Upon my pillow

Safely’n hand

A thousand pictures fill my head.

I cannot sleep; my mind’s aflight,

And yet I receive Made-of-Flesh.

There are noises,

Sweet or not,—

Afright it shall

Flee tonight

When Christ our anchor.—

On to sleep,

And counts of joy deep,

If Sacrosanct our song.

What dreams they

Chart, North dark and deep

All flying Prince and soaring live;

As Christ the Lamb died to sin

As Christ the Lamb died (to) to sin.

Sleep.

Sleep Sheep.

Sleep.

Sleep Sweet.

Sleep.

A Hypocrite and a Righteous Man

There was a hypocrite

Who, seeing that he had done much wrong

Said, “The LORD shall not exact from me

“This evil deed. I have murdered,

“Slandered my brother,

“I have stolen from him,

“And I have committed adultery

“Under every oak.

“LORD, I see I am justified by Your blessing

“Knowing I have sinned, You will not exact it from me.

“For, so I have committed offences,

“My grain offering shall be sufficient for the payment;—

“The fruit of my drink offerings and oblations poured into the ground.

“Yes, LORD You shall not visit me for this.

“Rather, when the bugle gets called

“I will enter into my heavenly abode.”

There was a righteous man

Seeing he had done much wrong

Who said, “LORD, I had defiled myself

“In the way. I have lain with two virgins

“Who were not my wife

“And I have defiled the covenant

“With the woman I was betrothed to.

“I had also done violence,

“And had lied for gain.

“I had spoken ill against You

“In my heart, and I had cursed my neighbor

“And I had falsely accused the innocent.

“LORD, I know certainly Your wrath

“Shall abide on me, until the day

“That these abominations are loosed from me,

“For how else, LORD, am I to be made clean?”

Another Parable I Told

A dish of vegetables

Goes into a kiln

At a low heat.

If one takes the vegetables

Out too early

They are not to the tooth.

So, when the vegetables come out

And are hard to the tooth,

They go back into the kiln.

So are the sons of men;

With affliction they are made wise

So that they are palpable to the tooth.

Mother Mary

In times of trouble

Said a man,

Mother Mary whispered, “Let it be.”

I was told nobody worships her.

I believe it.

But still, the priest says the alter is not clean

As if they have to order a new one.

It’s not the alter that is sanctified,

Nor the gift on the alter.

Rather, the heart of the repentant.

With that, it is Mary worship

To say the Alter is unclean

And to not cast out the laymen’s sin.

Throw it into the Sea, Judah;—

You know the whole world suffers from it.

We need cleansed;—

Men walk about with their hearts uncircumcised.

What does that mean?

We walk around with our hearts not purified

With that writhing animal within us.

I am not a Gnostic,

Because I say clearly it needs to come out.

How, though? If the priests forget their mysticism?

A thousand homilies cannot take that out;—

It must be done with power, and the knife

Of grace.

Protestants believe it not so;—

Catholics complain about the alter.

I have even heard it, but the knife needs

To be wielded, the surgeon needs to cut.

And should the cancer come up again,

I say, “We walk in the world, every one of us.”

Deliver us! Don’t leave us here, for God’s Sake

And His elect! It should be a treatment,

Like a drip bag, with a scalpel to take out the tumor.

Don’t let us suffer, with that ingrate inside of us

The one you hide, Judah.

Take it out with the knife,

And don’t say, “The alter.”

The alter has no power.

Only Christ has the power to save…

If the man’s heart were unclean

But truly repentant…

I’d say even the most unclean of alters

Would be sufficient.

The dirtiest table.

Throw the alcohol on it

And disinfect it,

Because the old testament laws are no longer aportioned.

Therefore, o Judah, because you understand it is so

Take the scalpel and cut from Elijah, from Judah, from Eleazar

That wife of his, the one who made them suffer all night

That strange wife,

And remove it from him with the scalpel God has given you

The Sword of The Spirit of the Elect.

Or… is it that you have lost faith in Christ?

Has Sardis made you soil your garments, as well?

To see unwieldy surgeons?

So it is, that Jesus is my LORD.

That is sufficient, now perform the cleansing ritual.

The Issue With American Education

The real issue with American education is one systemic in the culture. Our elite intellectuals are always trying to disprove that you can know anything, and our common lay people will believe that the pyramids were built by Sasquatch. Obviously that’s a joke… but the principle applies nonetheless.

Like, on one hand, we have every intellectual in the country trying to prove that we can’t know anything, and some kind of absurd skepticism, even claiming that reading and understanding something difficult is impossible, or at best subjective. They try to reinvent the wheel, try to change the arts, the humanities… they celebrate the most crude things and call it art, and then they like to try and prove that every status quo and conventional idea is wrong. That’s what the intelligentsia does in this country.

The lay people, they actively avoid reading, they do their best to figure out how Aliens could have built Stonehenge or they believe that the Illuminati controls the world; then they start merging the two theories, and get one master delusion that the bulk of people believe. They complain about their politicians, without thinking or considering who voted them into office. Then they are skeptical of the same people, and then try to use them as scapegoats to get out of the problems they themselves created.

And of course, both ends of this spectrum are trying to eliminate religion and trying to secularize the country. Which, hasn’t worked. And it won’t work, because its necessary for us as a culture to have God and religion. It’s so deeply ingrained in our society, that we need Jesus, and God; not only because He lives… but because Americans, frankly, by trying to figure everything out, get a head on their shoulder and will stop trying to understand what’s real, and start trying to explain the world with myths or just deny that anything can be known.

It’s the real problem in this country. Everyone wants to be right… so in that, they just kind of walk around in a shell of egocentricity, never actually listening or trying to figure out what could possibly be wrong with their lives, and it never crosses their minds that they could be wrong. They’re content to just believe that it’s always the other guy, that their freedoms mean they get to always be correct… And I can’t blame them. The schools have done everything in their power to say that there are no right or wrong answers, and the only right or wrong answers are on a test—which clearly tell you morally wrong things, so Americans get skeptical even more. So, that’s really the only idea that gets taught in school, is that every opinion is on equal footing, and that everyone is right so long as they can stay civil and don’t challenge the status quo. So we have a culture that pretty much denies the existence of truth, and tries to get by by never talking politics or religion. And in that regard, we elect Hilary and Trump.

Let it be clear to my audience that I’m a registered Republican.

Obviously, Elizabeth Warren or Joe Biden are the best candidates in the race right now. I’m going to be curious to see if either of them gets to the front runner, or if they will elect Bernie Sanders, which would be a disaster. Like, Americans are all radical, and they criticize Joe Biden for having unorthodox policies to the party. Like, that’s some scary stuff, when clearly he’s the best candidate next to Lizzy. And I’d vote for either of them in the next election. I won’t vote for Bernie because he’s completely inflamed on this Trump crusade, and it’s just stupid. Trump is probably going to be marked by a candidacy of uninformed voter populations, and probably will be used some day to prove how democracy doesn’t work. That’s unless Americans stop electing radicals to office, like Bernie or Obama or Trump. We need a legitimate candidate, not some Looney Tune.